Remember to change your underwear
by Gazlover12-Canada
Summary: Sometimes Batman's parenting style is just plain humiliating. Drabbles with humor, daddybats, and Dick being majorly embarrassed by his mentor in front of the team. Joint fic by me and Cosmo17!
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! This is a joint fic between my older brother (cosmo17) and I. It's basically just daddybats humor!:p**

**Enjoy!**

**Checklist**

Batman was very particular about his lists. The man was all about organization, always having to make sure that things were perfectly prepared and in order, especially before missions. This meant that Robin usually got dragged straight into the middle of it. He hated it. Of course, he would never admit this to his mentor, but the whole checklist thing was way out of hand. The first time he had done it at Mount Justice, in front of the whole team, Robin had found himself blushing and groaning the entire time.

"Okay Robin, let's go over it one more time."

"Ugh, do we have to?"

"Yes."

It really didn't leave any room for discussion. The Boy Wonder knew he just had to suck it up and take it. This would certainly be humiliating.

"This is a four day mission into the Amazon Jungle, so I want to be sure you are completely packed and prepared. Confirm each item as I check them off. Extra padded socks, three count?"

"Yes," Robin grumbled.

"Pants, three count?"

"Yes."

"Shirts, three count?"

"Uh-huh."

"Underwear, extra strength, three count?"

"Batman! Shh!"

Cackles of laughter could be heard from behind them. Wally's laugh was clearly defined, but Robin was sure that he heard Superboy's deep chuckle as well. Batman narrowed his eyes, seemingly oblivious to the laughter and his young ward's blushing face. He was probably more concerned with the fact that he had been shushed by a 13 year old.

"Robin, confirm Underwear, extra strength, three count?" he said gruffly.

"Confirmed! Jeez," The teen shot, crossing his arms as the laughter intensified behind them. Robin was sure he heard Artemis and Kaldar's laughter join the group.

Batman seemed to have noticed, spinning around with his clipboard in hand. He shot the teens a famous Bat-glare, silencing them quickly.

"May I inquire what is so funny?" he growled.

"Nothing Batman, Megan just told us all a really funny joke!" Wally said, grinning.

Batman looked unconvinced, but turned back to Robin.

"Toilet paper, two count?"

"Yes!"

Sometimes, Robin wondered if Batman just did these things to embarrass him on purpose.

**Morning **

"Robin, make sure you brush your teeth for exactly two minutes after you finish your bagel."

Richard Grayson sighed behind his sunglasses, taking a bite from his lightly buttered bagel. This was how his mornings always went. It seemed that even at Mount Justice, he couldn't escape the daily Bat-wrath.

"Got it Batman," he said, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"Did you get enough sleep last night? You look sleepy."

Wally West giggled into his cereal. The Bats had seriously just said 'sleepy.' Dick blushed, the embarrassing babying bringing him fully awake.

"I am not _sleepy_!"

"Watch your attitude young man."

Dick buried his face in his hands. This was so humiliating. Why was Batman even here? Or at least, why was he here so early? As if reading his ward's thoughts, Batman answered that question.

"You should get ready quickly this morning Robin. The team has a mission in two hours."

"What's the mission Batman?" He asked, momentarily forgetting the embarrassing situation that had just occurred.

"You'll find out with the rest of the team. Make sure you change your underwear this time Robin, Alfred said the weeks laundry only had two pairs in it."

Dick's face instantly went bright red, and Wally, who had been in mid-bite, snorted milk out of his nose. Batman glanced at the speedster, looking indifferent.

"I change them every morning!" he whined, though he kept his voice low to avoid anyone else hearing about the private matter, one that Batman obviously had no concern in voicing aloud.

"Not according to Alfred you don't. Make sure you use the bathroom before the mission today, I'll remind you before you go."

Dick just let his head bang onto the table. Wally walked from the room, laughing and already loudly telling the others what the Batman had just discussed with his partner. Sometimes, Dick wondered if he had done something horrible in a past life to deserve this.

**What do you think? Any suggestions?**


	2. Chapter 2

**Dinnertime**

"Dick, make sure you eat all of your veggies."

Richard Grayson groaned, stabbing a brussel sprout with his fork and popping it into his mouth with a huff. Bruce was not in a good mood tonight, and had turned to taking it out on his young ward. The thirteen year old despised brussel sprouts, and any other night he may have gotten away with leaving a few on his plate. Not tonight, it seemed. The very reason that Bruce was in a foul mood was sitting right across from him, stuffing his face messily with mashed potatoes and chicken. Barry Allen, AKA The Flash, had somehow managed to invite himself and his nephew Wally West over for dinner.

"Don't be rude Dick, Alfred made those brussel sprouts with love."

"Yeah Dick, looovvveee!" Wally said, snorting and downing half of his juice in one gulp.

He was rewarded with an elbow to the ribs, though the speedster just laughed it off. Dick shuffled in his seat, eyeing his plate with disdain. Suddenly, Bruce seemed to grow instantly alert, sniffing the air several times before glaring at Dick menacingly. The boy visibly flinched at the dark glare, and was about to ask what he did when Bruce asked for him.

"Dick, did you just fluff at the table?"

Wally burst into uncontrolled laughter, while Bruce continued to suspiciously eye the now red-faced boy. He sank low into his seat, trying to avoid the laughter coming from his friend and Barry.

"I didn't! And don't say 'fluff!'"

"But that's what I've always called it. And don't lie Dick, I can see right through it. As if it isn't bad enough when you fluff in the Batmobile…"

"BRUCE!"

The speedsters both laughed, much to Dick's embarrassment, as he sunk even lower into his seat with his face burning in humiliation. Bruce even had to smirk a bit at this. It appeared he was venting some of his annoyance onto the poor kid. Flash, finally controlling his laughter, spoke up.

"Actually guys, I admit it. I cut the cheese," he said, grinning wickedly.

Dick glared daggers at him, and Bruce just rolled his eyes. Wally couldn't stop laughing.

"So, you really fluffed in the Batmobile?" he asked.

"Shut up!"

**Bedtime**

Richard Grayson rapidly pressed the buttons on his Xbox controller, beating Wally's character to the floor successfully.

"Good one Robin!" Kaldar commented, and Megan cheered from the background.

The atmosphere was full of excitement as the rowdy teens continued their weekend-long video game competition at Mount Justice. The action was getting intense, and it was ten o'clock at night. They had had the place to themselves for the entire weekend to socialize and have fun, and that is exactly what they intended to do. That is, until a very stern looking Batman materialized out of the Zeta tube and strode over to the group. He walked straight at Robin, who knew nothing good could come out of this.

"Robin, what are you doing up?"

"Huh?" Dick tried to feign innocence, but knew exactly what Bruce was talking about. On non-patrol nights, his bedtime was 9:30 pm.

"Don't play dumb with me Robin, you know your bedtime is 9:30 on the dot. I suggest you brush your teeth and get in your pj's as well."

Dick blushed as the all too familiar sound of the team's collective laughter filled the room.

"But Batman, it's a weekend! I'm hanging out with the team!"

"No excuses young man, you'll be sleepy in the morning if you don't go now."

Dick knew that it was no use arguing with a grumpy Batman, and dejectedly passed his controller to Conner and trudged out of the room. Five minutes passed, and the team looked to see Robin, clad in his Bat-Symbol pajamas, sneaking back out to the lounge area.

"I don't think so Robin."

Dick jumped in surprise as he felt Batman's hand on his shoulder.

"Say goodnight to the team."

Dick blushed once again at the childish expectations, but wished them all a good night either way. Batman kept his hand on the Boy Wonder's shoulder, leading him from the room.

"Alright, let's get you all tucked in," Batman said, in clear earshot of the entire team.

"You don't need to! I'm not a kid anymore," Dick grumbled, growing more embarrassed by the second. He could hear the girls "aww-ing" at the adorable situation.

Batman frowned.

"But, I always tuck you in when I'm around."

This caused laughter to erupt from the team, and the girls loving the affection coming from such a stoic figure.

"Yeah yeah, I know," Dick gave in, looking down at his feet.

Maybe Bruce Wayne was just a bit to caring at times, but Dick was thankful that he had him either way.

**Thank you to all those who reviewed the last chapter! Hope this one was good too! Most of the credit goes to my brother, who typed;) I came up with the ideas though!**


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